Why you really need to go to Norway

One dark February afternoon, whilst sat at my desk at work, I decided I should book a trip to Norway.

I’ve wanted to go for a long time, inspired by incredible photos of beautiful Fjords, huge forests and healthy looking people climbing mountains. Most importantly, however, it was as a rainy Wednesday afternoon at work aka: ‘the danger zone’. Other trips booked on a Wednesday afternoon include Budapest, Washington and Skye, so you get the idea.

After reading about a few places in Norway, I decided to try Bergen. Bergen probably isn’t the most popular place in Norway to visit, with the cultural city Oslo and the magical northern-light filled Tromso, topping the charts. However, with BA opening up a new route there from London and my guide book describing it as ‘one of the world’s most beautiful cities’, I thought it would be worth a trip.

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A few weeks later and I was free from the office and flying into Norway. The flight to Norway itself is worth a trip. As you near Bergen airport, below you are hundreds of small islands and waterways, sparkling away in the sunshine. It was one of the most beautiful landings I’ve ever had (and as a nervous flyer, landings for me tend to be fairly traumatic).

Once we arrived in the immaculate Bergen airport, we quickly found an equally immaculate bus and set off on the immaculate roads towards town. If there is one thing that Norwegians do well: it’s fantastic infrastructure!

As soon as we were dropped off in Bergen, I knew we had made the right choice. It was a beautifully sunny Saturday and Bergen marathon was in full swing. Whilst blonde, athletic types jogged past, I had my first sight of the infamous ‘Bryggen’. Set on Bergen’s wide waterfront, with mountains in the background, this Unesco World Heritage-listed waterfront district is also known as ‘the Wharf’. Made up of lopsided, colourful, wooden buildings, these now 58 restaurants and boutiques date back to 1702 (after a fire burnt down the original buildings) and originally housed the fishermen that had worked and lived here since the 12th century. The buildings are truly beautiful and you could easily pass a day here, sitting in the sunshine and enjoying a drink or bite to eat on the waterfront.

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We then checked in at our hotel: Det Haseatiske Hotel. This special little hotel is near the waterfront and is the only hotel in Bergen to be housed inside the old timber buildings of the Bryggen. It’s creaky, uneven, and brilliant! If you’re visiting this area, definitely try and stay a night here.

One of the first things to do in Bergen is to take the Flobanen Furnicular to the top of a nearby mountain, for views across Bergen – once the capital of Norway. The views are breathtaking, allowing you to see Bergen’s unique location, surrounded by seven hills and seven fjords. The walks around here are also worthwhile and we found a crystal-clear lake and great forest trail, back down into Bergen. En-route you’ll pass lots of colourful, timber-clad houses and cobble-stone lanes, which just add to the whole feel of the place.

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Another thing to do in Bergen is most definitely a Fjord tour. Bergen is known as a ‘gateway’ to the Fjords and tours are easy to come by. We booked onto the popular ‘Norway in a Nutshell Tour’, which included a train journey and Fjord journey. We set off bright and early on a breath-taking train ride from Bergen to Voss, past crystal clear lakes and tiny villages. We then got on a (predictably, immaculate) bus to Gudvagen, where we began our boat tour up the spectacular fjords to Flam. It’s difficult to describe just how beautiful the fjords are. It’s almost surreal. The water is icy-blue and reflects perfectly the enormous mountains and hills surrounding you. It’s so peaceful (aside from the greedy squawky seagulls!) and fresh, that I could happily have spent a few days on that boat. Anyone who goes to Norway must make sure they do a boat tour! At the other end, we got off at Flam and began a famous railway journey through snowy hilltops and past ice-cold waterfalls. The whole day was perfect.

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As we were only there for a few days, we didn’t have a huge amount of time to fit much else in. But I would definitely recommend visiting the Bergen museum and Leprosy museum (why not?!), along with as many walks around the hills that surround Bergen as possible. A word or warning, Bergen, as with the whole of Norway, is expensive. I enjoyed a lovely £18 glass of wine! But it is most definitely worth it. Norway, I love you!

Marrakech: the Tale of One Bad Egg

Marrakech is an incredible place to visit. Endless mazes of souks; bright vibrant colours; the amazing smells of spices and burning oils; magic lantern shops; flying carpet shops; snake charmers and fortune tellers, all ensure that Marrakech is a sensory overload for any visitor. I loved it.

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Marrakech is split into two parts: an old town at the centre (think winding passageways, souks and donkeys) and a modern town on the outside (big hotels, business plazas and fast cars). To make sure we truly experienced the place, we chose to stay in the old town, in a traditional ‘Riad’ and stayed at the incredible Riad Dixneuf La Ksour, which I could not recommend enough. This place is an oasis!

We spent our first few days there exploring the old town and, like typical tourists, were royally ripped off. A word of warning: you will be invited into an endless amount of ‘apothecaries’, which sell oils and powders for every single ailment. Once inside, you will be given samples of lots of beautiful smelling things: amber, frankincense, rose water etc and told how they will transform your life. Excited, we naturally bought everything. However, once we got home, we realised the sample they showed us and the actual items we took home were VERY different. I actually have no idea what they were. I tried to burn the frankincense and it smelt like burning petrol. I rubbed the ‘amber’ perfume on my neck and got a really great rash. Oh.

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Whilst in Marrakech, I would definitely recommend taking a few trips out. For a small amount of money, we took a car to amazing places like Aït Benhaddou – a town built into a red, sandy hillside; we saw the Kazbah were Churchill used to spend nights being seduced by exotic Moroccan dancers; and visited the Atlas mountains and froze to death. The landscape in Morocco is breathtaking – a lot like Mars, so it’s worth a visit.

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On our last day, in Marrakech, however, everything went drastically wrong. We were on a trip to the mountains and stopped off by a small restaurant by the side of the road. Once there, we were shown to our table where, surprisingly, food was ready and waiting. Now, I am not sure how long that food had been there, but I noticed a lot of flies on mine. However being British and overly-polite, I decided to gently waft the flies away and went for it. It seemed to be a chicken/eggy dish and it tasted weird. Right then, I knew I was going down. A few hours later, on a dark, rainy taxi ride back down the Atlas mountains, I began to sweat. A lot. My stomach began to make some very disturbing noises and was churning. The taxi driver declared I was hungry and kindly gave me half a chocolate bar. I forced it down and held back the retches. By the next day and our flight home, I knew something was definitely wrong. To cut a long story short, I had salmonella – salmonella that lasted nearly three months and included highlights such as: 9 visits to the doctor, 3 trips to the hospital, drinking 2 litres of laxative and one procedure I am still not ready to talk about. Perhaps ever.

I loved Marrakech and would recommend it to anyone. But sometimes one experience travelling seems to taint a place and unfortunately for me, I shall ever equate beautiful Morocco with a bad egg and the time my digestive tract took me on an adventure I would never like to repeat.

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Bucket list let downs

After reading a recent article by The New Yorker’s Rebecca Mead, Kicking the Bucket List, it got us thinking about our own bucket list let downs and why steering clear of some of the guide books ‘Top 10s’ is probably a good idea.

To prove a point, here’s a round up of our Top 5 bucket list let downs:

1) Vatican, Rome: Now, it may just have been the intense 40 degree heat but touring the Vatican was not exactly how we pictured it.  In fact, the Sistine chapel experience wasn’t a whole lot different to trying to get on the tube in rush hour. Hoards of heavily sweating tourists, packed into one room, with guards SHUSHING you every 30 seconds is not quite the awe inspiring experience your guide books lead you to believe. After several elbow punches to the face and awkward sweaty encounters, we gave up trying to look at the ceiling and went and sat in a corner with a Japanese couple who were having a nap. The fact that we remember more about the napping Japanese couple than the chapel itself probably speaks for itself. This experience also taught us that we will never, ever again do a group audio tour.

2) Koh Samui, Thailand (aka the Tenerife of SE Asia): How half the population of the UK have found their way to a small island off Thailand, we do not know, but they have. The ‘paradise’ beaches of this island were filled with squabbling families, deflated lilos and beer bottles. If you squinted a bit, you really could have been in Tenerife (sorry for any Tenerife lovers out there). The only real memory of this trip was the constant playing of Michael Buble ‘Home’ in all bars and restaurants, which was quite ironic really.

3) Marrakesh, Morocco: This probably isn’t Marrakesh’s fault, but this entire trip was ruined by the worst salmonella poisoning (probably) in living history and several trips to the hospital. Chicken with flies on it. Yay!

4) Gondola ride, Venice: A must, right? Cruising down the canals of Venice, clutching the hand of your loved one. Umm, not so much. After being charged a small fortune just to get on the gondola and enduring the awkward silence of our gondolier who only spoke when he asked if he could have a Pringle (he actually ate half the pack), we were kind of glad to get off and enjoy Venice by foot…and alone.

5) Swimming with dolphins, Jamaica: This was already a controversial bucket list addition because let’s face it, dolphins are not on this planet to be endlessly half-mounted by humans and ‘ridden’ around a small circular pool.  However, we gave it a go in Jamaica….and we really wished we hadn’t. The only memory from this event was the disappointed/disgusted faces of two dolphins as they slowly dragged two overweight individuals the length of the pool. We got out shortly after that and tried to erase the memory, immediately.

So, not the best bucket list experiences.  Thinking about it, when we look back at most of our travels, a lot of our highlights really don’t come from bucket list destinations or experiences, in fact hardly any of them do.  For example, we’re sure that visiting a pitch-black, slightly creepy, public toilet in Sicily where Laura weed all the way down her leg in a panic to get out, probably isn’t in the Lonely Planet guide, but it’s  one of the most memorable and entertaining memories of our trip there!

Moral of this blog post? Try going bucketlist-less every now and again, you’re  not missing out on much!

Everyone’s idea of heaven?

Whereas Claire prefers an educated city-break, I (Laura) am obsessed with tropical holidays. Sand, blue skies and turquoise water makes me almost tearful with joy. So when I eventually arranged to visit the Maldives, I was manic.

As ever, I TripAdvised the hell out of where we were staying, assuming that everyone would conclude the Maldives is a little piece of heaven. I was wrong. I came across a review, which gave the resort just one star. The reviewer told the bizarre story of how this island was so small, so relaxed and so private, that his wife actually had a panic attack and was air lifted off the island. The place was so relaxing, it actually made someone anxious. Ironic.

So it turns out, not everyone loves island life.

The Maldives feels like nowhere else on earth.  It also feels a very long way from anywhere else on earth. The capital, Malé, looks like something from ‘Sim City’ (hello childhood): a small island, with buildings and towers built to the very edge of its sandy beaches. From here, you hop on a tiny sea plane that flies over the islands and lands in the sea near your resort (a plane that floats, a massive plus for a flyer with a nervous disposition).

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We stayed at the Grand Centara Resort and yes, it is tiny. You can walk around the island in just ten minutes and recognise everyone within a day. You also realise fairly quickly that there is no sight-seeing to be done, no museums and only three restaurants to visit. The only thing you can do is relax. Lie down. Be at one with your thoughts and all that.

Initially, maybe that is weird and a little unsettling. There’s very little to busy yourself with. But soon enough, you begin to find that what there is, is just enough.The sea is like a warm bath, filled with colourful little fish. The coral that surrounds the islands is beyond beautiful. The sunsets are incredible. You nap 5 times a day.

Going to somewhere like the Maldives forces you to relax. And it makes you realise how very unrelaxed you are during your everyday life. It’s a little like unclenching a bum cheek you didn’t realise you were tensing. So go visit! 

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